Ask James: ‘How Do I Ensure My Friend Doesn’t Hog All The Attention At Our Joint 30th?’

James Kavanagh answers your questions like only a gas bitch can.

It’s me and my friend’s joint 30th coming up soon. How do I ensure all of the attention is not on her – as it usually is – but is on us equally? Or more on me. I don’t mind, just as long as I’m not totally forgotten about. Melissa, Dublin

You need to plan an entrance. Usually for something like this you’d get ready together and arrive together, right? Well not this time… Make up something (your hair appointment ran over) which enables you to arrive late, on your own, with your secret entrance plan. Maybe get those sparkler things they stick in drink buckets in Ibiza clubs and parade in twerking at least 20 minutes late.
Also, agree to get a photographer and secretly tip him an extra €50 to get stunning photos of you but not great angles of your friend. Job done.

My boyfriend creeps on hot fitness girls on Instagram and likes their pictures. It’s making me jealous and I sometimes go mad at him, but I feel ridiculous. How do I deal with this? Mairead, Cork

I always question whether monogamy is truly a thing… I think couples need to allow one another a little bit of leeway to express their appreciation for other hot humans – to an extent. If you walk in one day and find him doing the spread eagle with one of these fitness models, then you’ve an issue, but a dash of Insta-creeping here and there is graaaaand.

I sent an email to a colleague of mine – about her – meant for someone else. The email was about how she is doing my head in. This was two weeks ago and neither of us has acknowledged that it happened. What do I do? Anna, Dublin

Normally, I’d advise a person in a situation like this to grab it by the horns and come clean and face the gal; it might actually give you a chance to sort out the issues you have with them. However, considering she hasn’t acknowledged this and is carrying on as if life is normal, I’m gonna say just leave it. Let it go. And maybe pay the IT person a few bob to extract and delete the email from the systems so she can’t use it against you if she suddenly wants revenge. Always cover them tracks, girl.

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