10 Things You Need To Know Before You Try Anal Sex
Anal sex is no longer the taboo subject it once was. We're here to tell you what you need to do to avoid any morto experiences if and when you try it.
Anal sex beginner’s pack:
1. A large glass of vino (trust us on this one, it’ll help)
2. Condoms (duh!)
3. A big bottle of lube
4. Anal beads
Anal sex is becoming increasingly popular, with 52% of Irish people admitting to enjoying some back-door action. However, some people delve into the world of the unknown sans guidelines and get a nasty surprise. With that in mind, here are 10 things you need to know before you give it the old college try.
1. Don’t over-douche
It’s all well and good paying attention to cleanliness, but it’s important not to clean yourself too rigorously – you may end up drying out the anal canal, making it incredibly painful. The other major con? It could increase the chances of STI transferral.
2. Aim for apres-movement, okay?
Try to, er, empty your bowels before you embark on your anal adventures for what should be very obvious reasons. (A top tip is not to plan too rigidly; if you’ve agreed to have anal – or any kind of sex – at 7pm on a Friday, it puts you under a lot of pressure.)
3. You won’t poo on him (hopefully)
We’ve all heard of the woman – or man – who lost their anal virginity on a night that is now known as “the time I pooed on my boyfriend”. See #2, above – and perhaps swear your partner to in-any-event secrecy, just in case.
4. It doesn’t have to be (super) painful
Okay, let’s be real here: anal sex is always going to be a lot uncomfortable, and a little sore at the start. Use loads of lube, start with a finger and work up to something like a small vibrator or butt plug. Only embark on bona (if you’ll excuse the pun) anal sex when you feel totally and utterly ready and if, at any point, you feel like it’s all getting a bit intense for you, call a halt to proceedings. It’s about pacing yourself and knowing what’s right – and wrong – for your body, and your booty.
5. It’s like Marmite
Just like Marmite, some people absolutely love it and others absolutely hate it. Unlike Marmite, however, some people pretend to love anal because they want to please their partner. Don’t be that person. Give it a chance and, who knows? It could be right up your, er, street.
6. It doesn’t mean he’s gone off regular sex
Think of anal as another part of your totally normal sexual repertoire – it’s just another potentially fun part of enjoying sex and trusting another person enough to go where no wo/man has gone before. But suggesting, or indulging in, anal sex doesn’t mean it’s the end of your comfy missionary life; this’ll be like the occasional 69 you’ve been known to indulge in, complementing, rather than substituting for, all that other good stuff.
7. More than half of Ireland’s doing it
We are no longer the closed-minded nation we once were, according to the most recent sex survey carried out by The Irish Times – a whopping 52% of those surveyed admitted to having tried anal sex.
8. Foreplay is a must
Just like vaginal sex, you’ll need to get warmed up first. Not only is it important to lubricate the anus and loosen it up a bit before you make the big entry, it’s also a good idea to have a drink or two in order to relax those muscles.
9. Use protection
We all know you can’t get pregnant through anal (honest, you can’t) – but the skin inside your anus is more delicate than inside your vagina, and rough housing can result in slight tears, which means anal sex ups your chances of contracting an STI (if the other person has one, obviously). Be smart and wrap it up.
10. You can say no
If you’re just not in to it, say it! And if you feel any pressure whatsoever, make it clear that you don’t appreciate having your sexual desires and your choices called into question. It’s your bum, and what you want to do with it is absolutely your business.