Telly 23rd May 2021 by Hannah Hillyer
The Kids Are All Right – A Recap On KUWTK’s Final Season – Episode 9
Vicki is back with her weekly deep dive into the latest episode of KUWTK.
The last episode is nearing, y’all. Only a handful are left, and the gang are getting nostalgic and making big changes to their lives.
This week’s first storyline is all about Khloe is building her dream home from the ground up. She bought her current home after her painful divorce from Lamar Odom, and it’s been her all-white haven ever since, filled with decorative cookie jars that never empty and more fresh flowers than you could shake a stick at.
She’s excited though, because the footprint of her new home is GIGANTIC, and she will be living RIGHT next door to her mother, Kris, who is also building a Mega Mansion. Like everything with this family, the proportions are epic. I need the refurbishment to be on HGTV, preferably decorated by the divine Nate & Jeremiah. If you think Kardashians are my only reality baes, you’d be dead wrong, btw.
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Next up, we see Scott and Kim discussing the show coming to an end, and the effect, or lack thereof it’s had on their kids. I’m getting irritated at this point that nobody is talking about Kanye’s absence, his wild behaviour online and just the completely obvious fact that their marriage has imploded. Perhaps they’re saving it for the very end.
Anyway, Scott is wondering when the kids should be allowed watch the show, and what they’ll think. Apparently Mason didn’t give a shite when Kourtney told him it was all ending, despite having literally being pulled from her vagina BY her on camera. They LOL that True should be called Truman, cos her life has been like The Truman Show. Hahahahahaha… my greatest fear.
Thinking about the kids watching the show freaks them both out. Scott says he’s the only one that’s done anything bad, but that’s not exactly true. Yes, he’s the only one that’s been filmed being abusive to staff and punching mirrors in a drunken stupor, but I’m sure Kimmy is mortified about all of season one and two, the entire Kris Humphries saga and more along the way.
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Arc three – Kris is freaking out about construction going on next door and Khloe says it’s exemplary of her catastrophism and negative attitude, which she says is contagious. They’ll return to this later.
Khloe is selling her house quickly because she got a whopper offer. But she has to be out quickly so she’s stressing. Tristan is being unhelpful as usual. GOD, he absolutely rots me. I hate the way the show is trying to make him out to seem sweet and caring when his behaviour has just always exhibited otherwise. He’s also deadly dull and a total eejit, and I’m just completely over them trying to make him happen. He is no Scott Disick. I’m not even bothered talking about the storyline where he’s apparently copying Khloe’s interior style so she’ll move in with him and feel comfortable there. Ugh. None of it is cute.
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Back to the girls who are eating together. It comes up that Kourtney pissed off Kim’s nanny and is now accusing her of lying. Kourtney is nanny was inappropriate and she would never work for her because of her attitude, but Kim is saying the nanny felt degraded and Kim believes her because Kourtney is essentially known for being a wagon. Kourtney gets upset, saying Kim is full of sh*t and should look in the mirror.
“I do every, five minutes!” is Kim’s ICONIC retort. It’s funny because it’s true!
Kourtney is super sensitive when it comes to Kim criticising her, probably harking back to their massive, physical fight last year. Khloe comforts her saying that they learned neggy behaviour from their mom, and are always purposely trying to piss each other off, hence the tension and general rattiness. It’s making for bad energy, apparently. They’re all obsessed with energy which I half get, and half think is privileged white lady bullsh*t. We all have good and bad moments, y’all.
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On a trip down memory lane, Scott and Kim bring the kids to see his first place with Kourtney and Khloe. They’re loving all the looking back, but the kids DGAF which is actually gas. Mason is so grown up, I feel ANCIENT. Next, they go to Kim’s home theatre and let the kids watch an edit of their best bits on the show.
They don’t care, I’m bawling and Scott is beside himself. Penelope is grossed out by watching all the births – “my eyes are watering because it’s so disgusting.” North gets all the attention but Penelope is low key hilarious. The way the two of them are sitting on the couch together judging everyone makes me so excited for them to be 17 and the next generation tbh. It’s pretty obvious Scott had an ulterior motive here, showing Kourtney the happier times together but it clearly didn’t work. The poor fecker.
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The girls all agree to be less neggy using a time old tradition of a kind-of swear jar. Cash will get these gals to do just about anything! Kris is upset she’s hereditarily gifted her bitchy tendencies to her girls but tbh, where would the show be without them? Iffy personality traits make for great telly.
Next week, it’s Kendall’s 25th and Kris’ 65th birthdays! But Kim has some covid drama at home….