Our Toxic Relationship With Ageing

via Mubi

Twenty step skin care routine, stay out of sunlight, eat a plant rich diet, no alcohol or caffeine. Have you heard of this new skin care treatment? What about this new Botox? Surely you want to get a nip or a tuck?

We have been consuming anti-aging content for years. The concept of people, especially women, aging is not comprehended within modern society. Aging is seen as a biological flaw, something that makes you undesirable and something that must be prevented at all costs. But why is this? Is it really so bad to grow old and have it show?

Of course this toxicity has been around much longer than the dawn of social media. We have seen time and time again in pop culture the older man divorce his wife for a younger woman. A major factor that contributes to women’s fear of aging is the film industry and how once women reach a certain age, usually 30-40, she is cast as the mother in the story…  sometimes even grandmother.

Take Forest Gump. Sally Field played Forests mother even though she is only ten years older than Tom Hanks. Similarly in the 2018 movie Aquaman, Nicole Kidman plays Jason Momoa’s mother even though she is only twelve years older than him, and is the exact same age as his love interest Lisa Bonet.

There is also the trope of the “evil old woman,” who is visibly aged and does not fit conventional beauty standards, and therefore she must be evil.

 

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We’ve most recently seen these aging insecurities been brought to life with Coralie Fargeat’s 2024 movie The Substance. The film is a mock of society’s fear of aging and the drastic lengths people will go to remain youthful and have the so called “perfect body” and “perfect look.”

The discourse around the movie also proves the point of society’s obsession with age, specifically around the star of the movie, Demi Moore. Demi was 61 at the time of filming and participated in a lot of nude scenes. Many viewers have expressed shock at how Demi “looks good for her age,” further feeding in to the ideal that older women cannot look good.

It is also worth noting though, that this specific movie has gained such traction, even winning multiple awards including a Golden Globe and five Oscar nominations. Could this mean that Hollywood is taking a step in the right direction and trying to change negative views on aging in general?

In general, women have been taught through this lens that growing older will make them less desirable. The new global anti-aging trend, known as prejuvenation’s, goal is “doing everything possible to prevent sagging skin, wrinkles and lines from forming in the first place”.

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These excessive beauty standards of doll smooth skin, and flawless bodies have grown outside of the celebrity world since the rise of social media over the last decade or so. Women and young girls are constantly consuming picture perfect faces and bodies which are causing harmful comparisons and body image issues.

Even children are trying to get their hands on retinol serums to reduce fine lines and wrinkles. There is a new skin care and beauty trend every week, such as LED light therapy to reduce inflammation and promote collagen production to appear younger.

The second a grey hair is spotted on our heads it is either plucked or dyed. There are now nutricosmetics, which involves Biofarma Groups anti-aging food supplements. There are peptide serums, probiotics, collagen supplements, profhilo and C02 laser treatments. What ever happened to a simple moisturiser?

Not only are people constantly trying to slow down their natural aging with skin care and diet, society has also adapted more harmful anti-aging trends that cause permanent changes to our bodies. ‘Tweakment culture’ is allowing people to undergo slight modifications to make small changes to their face and body for aesthetic purposes.

 

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Of course, women can avail of treatments to boost their confidence and make them feel more secure in themselves. But how much is too much? This constant need to alter and ‘fix’ the face and body is destroying the concept of self-love and creating unreachable beauty standards.

Common procedures now include botox, face lifts, lip and cheek filler, BBLs, liposuction, eyelid surgery, vollure injections, boob lifts and augmentation, tummy tucks… the list goes on.

Aging should not be seen as something to fear. Instead we should view it as something to be grateful for. Whether it’s smile lines, forehead wrinkles, grey hairs or loose skin, we should start looking at these societal flaws as beautiful aging patterns and acknowledge how lucky we are to have our health and to have reached the age we are.

Instead of focusing on exteriors, let’s try find the beauty within and let it shine through.