Real Talk 13th April 2016 by Paula Lyne
It’s Over! 9 Signs Your On-Off Relationship Needs To End Like, Right Now
Don't let it get nasty like Charlotte and Gaz.
Charlotte Crosby and Gary Beadle’s mega bust-up over social media earlier this month didn’t look like it was fun for either party, but at least it cemented one thing – their relationship is well and truly over. At least for now.
Breaking up with someone is incredibly heart-wrenching, especially if you both still have feelings for one another. So it’s no surprise that many couples end up re-kindling things, even if it’s not necessarily the best idea in the long run.
But how do you know when it’s time to call it quits for good on an on-off relationship? There’s no easy answer, but here are a few big alarm bells…
1. You argue more than you laugh
Constant tension gets exhausting after a while, with both of you simply waiting for the next argument to spark up. If you feel like you’re always walking on eggshells, it could be a sign you need to call it a day.
2. You’re waiting for some big ‘eureka’ moment
According to every rom-com ever, when you know, you just know. Unfortunately in life things aren’t so clear-cut, and if you’re hanging around waiting for some massive sign that you two shouldn’t be together, you could be waiting quite a while. Take some time to think about what in the relationship does or doesn’t feel right, and let that guide your decision.
3. You’ve stopped telling people when you two break up/get back together
It happens so often, what’s the point in sharing? If you two have had so many break-ups and make-ups that you can’t keep track, it’s time to get some proper space. A relationship needs a solid foundation, and all you have right now is a pile of rubble.
4. There’s no trust anymore
Whether one of you cheated, or you simply have a suspicion that something isn’t right, a lack of trust is a sure sign things aren’t going to end well. Not only does it lead to constant arguments, but you’ll find yourself blaming your partner for things outside of their control (‘WHY was she looking at you like that?’)
5. You’re starting to find everyone else attractive
The lad who made your turkey and hummus wrap in the café earlier, the guy you travelled three floors with in the lift this morning… If someone so much as glances in your direction you imagine ripping their clothes off. Or marrying them and having kids. Whichever.
6. Your SO doesn’t enter your head during the day
And it’s a relief when you know you won’t be seeing them later. Making time for your partner should never feel like a chore. If it does, it could be time to reconsider what you’re really getting from this relationship.
7. Every time it ends, it’s for the same reasons
No matter how hard you try, you can’t change someone unless they want to change themselves. If your partner keeps making promises and then going back on them after a few weeks or months, either learn to live with their flaws or call it quits.
8. Your arguments have turned nasty
If every row is now a full-on screaming match with both of you throwing bullets or bringing up the past, it’s definitely a sign you need to say goodbye. Ain’t nobody got time for that kind of negativity.
9. You’re staying with them out of fear
Fear of loneliness, fear of never finding someone new, fear of how angry they’ll be if you end things again – if anxiety or worry is what’s keeping you in the relationship, it’s simply not going to last. You’ll never know what happiness lies ahead if you don’t give yourself a chance to be single.