More Than Fun: Why Sex Toys Matter For Your Sexual Wellness

Living in the 21st century, chances are you’ve already heard of sextech — a world of playful apps and smart devices, all designed to enhance your sex life and deliver intense pleasure. But here’s the twist: those pleasure-focused technologies are actually part of a bigger field called FemTech, which isn’t just about fun in the bedroom — it’s also about women’s sexual health.

So yes, that vibrator on your nightstand? It’s not only for solo play or spicing things up with a partner. It can also serve as a therapeutic tool for conditions like vaginismus.

And of course, we can’t ignore the unsettling history. Vibrators and what we now call sex toys were once used in earlier centuries as a supposed “cure” for “hysteria”. The first versions looked questionable at best, sparked endless controversy, and often caused more suffering than relief. Pretty terrifying, right?

But time moves on, and so does technology. Today, these devices have evolved into something entirely different: new designs, new purposes, and new ways to bring not only pleasure but also genuine benefits for sexual wellness. Suddenly, it all feels far more inviting — even exciting — to explore.

So if your curiosity is piqued, here’s what you need to know about FemTech. To understand better how it can enhance not just our sex lives but our overall sexual wellbeing, we spoke to Orlagh Reid — an IACP-accredited psychotherapist and coach specializing in clinical sexology. She’s also the founder of the Hey Gyno! Community, which supports women in Ireland living with sexual disorders, vaginismus, vulva pain conditions, and sexual anxiety.

What exactly is FemTech, and why is it becoming such a key part of the conversation around women’s health and sexuality?

“FemTech is far more than just a trend in pleasure products,” Orlagh begins. “It encompasses the full spectrum of women’s sexual and reproductive health, catering to every age and stage — well beyond menopause.”

As a psychosexual health professional and group facilitator, Orlagh has seen firsthand how FemTech is transforming lives by giving women the chance to take control of their sexuality and health like never before. “This industry is liberating women of all ages,” she says, “in ways no other has before.”

How specifically does FemTech help women improve their sexual health?

“FemTech, which also includes sextech, is often associated with intimate well-being products like vibrators, clitoral stimulators, suction toys, and vulva ‘grinders’,” explains Orlagh. “The focus is shifting away from penetrative toys and toward clitoral and external stimulation.”

This shift isn’t random — it’s intentional, reflecting women’s real experiences, many of which are shaped by sexual disorders such as endometriosis or vaginismus, where penetrative toys can feel unappealing or even painful.

“And by reframing sex toys as intimate well-being products, and marketing them to women, by women,” says Orlagh, “the industry is promoting body confidence, sex positivity, and sexual health.”

To illustrate, Orlagh points to TENS (transcutaneous electrical nerve stimulation) machines, which have long been used to help manage abdominal pain — particularly during periods and labour contractions. For a more innovative example, she highlights the Perifit device for pelvic floor rehabilitation. Shaped a bit like a mini-vibrator with soft, curvy sides, Perifit strengthens pelvic muscles and supports women dealing with urine leaks, prolapse, and even back pain.

“These products put women in control of their sexual and pelvic well-being,” Orlagh says, “offering tools that are just as therapeutic as they are empowering.”

How does FemTech liberate women?

“FemTech gives women permission to self-advocate, to understand their own bodies, and to arrive at medical appointments informed and empowered,” adds Orlagh. “That alone is groundbreaking.”

She also explains that because women have taken over the market, innovation is advancing rapidly. Women understand their own bodies, concerns, and needs better than men do. That’s why FemTech, which is designed by women for women, puts us 100 percent in control of our sexual and pelvic health. “It gives us permission to demand more — more than pain-free intimacy, more than addressing medical indifference.”

“Women deserve sexual pleasure, satisfaction, and well-being — solo or with a partner,” says Orlagh. “So forget handbag shopping. It’s time to start FemTech shopping […] because it’s the future of women’s health.”

How accessible is FemTech? Is it something that can be available for everyone?

This is where Orlagh points out what she sees as FemTech’s biggest downside: cost. The price tag is a major frustration and a barrier to accessibility for many women.

But when have high-quality health products ever been cheap — whether it’s a vaginal rejuvenation laser or even something as common as an electric toothbrush?

“When it comes to your health, investing in body-safe, regulated, high-quality products is vital — and worth it,” Orlagh recommends.

How is Fem/SexTech changing modern intimacies?

Orlagh explains that there are fem/sextech products designed specifically for couples, with big potential to enhance intimacy. “This is particularly important for women who have aversions to sexual touch from a partner,” she notes.

She even points out something surprising: “Did you know some women get the ick just from feeling aroused?” For many, sensory aversions related to sex are very real — even something as simple as the texture of lubricant can feel overwhelming.

“Fear, pain, and aversions to partner touch — whether foreplay or penetration — are often more common in women who are neurodivergent,” Orlagh adds. “And in these cases, FemTech can be a valuable tool to help enhance intimacy.”

She gives us another example of Ohnut, a set of soft penetration-customisation rings that reduce pain during intercourse caused by conditions like endometriosis, vaginismus, or other forms of pelvic pain — making sex more comfortable and enjoyable for both partners.

“For couples experiencing sexual dysfunction or difficulty reaching orgasm, introducing FemTech and sextech into their intimacy can enhance arousal, ease performance pressure, and bring not just fun but genuine therapeutic value,” says Orlagh.

But what about the question so many couples ask — if a woman can only reach orgasm through clitoral stimulation with a vibrator, should her partner feel worried? Threatened, even?

“Absolutely not,” says Orlagh. Men don’t need to feel intimidated by FemTech — in fact, it can positively influence them too. Isn’t it a relief to know your partner isn’t in pain and can truly enjoy intimacy?

“And even when it comes to sextech purely for pleasure, the industry isn’t about replacing partners,” she explains. “It’s about transforming women’s sexual agency and ensuring pain-free, shameless intimacy for all.” Then she adds, “If men feel intimidated by anything, it should be the knowledge gap that still exists around women’s sexuality.”

There are also some theories suggesting that sextech is one of the reasons why Gen Z is experiencing a “sex recession.” Do you think that’s true?

Orlagh doesn’t think so, pointing out that she’s never come across any research papers supporting the claim. In fact, it may just be coincidence, since other factors — like anxiety, economic pressure, and digitalism — are more concrete explanations, and there’s no confirmation of causation.

“If anything, I believe that FemTech is giving gay and straight women, as well as couples, permission and autonomy to connect with their sexual selves in a way that we already know men do,” says Orlagh.

So, what’s the healthiest way to integrate FemTech devices into one’s sex life — especially within relationships?

Orlagh suggests that the best way is to treat FemTech as part of open, honest communication. “Make it a shared experience rather than something secret or hidden,” she stresses.

For example, you can talk with your partner about which fem/sextech products appeal to you — whether for sexual pleasure or reproductive health — and explain how they might enhance intimacy or support specific health needs.

“And perhaps most importantly,” says Orlagh, “stop hiding your sextech under the bed or at the back of your wardrobe like it’s a dirty secret. These products are tools for health and wellbeing as much as they are for pleasure — so keep them accessible and normalised.”

Words by Dana Shymha