Real Talk 26th March 2015 by Rosemary Mac Cabe
Heard Of Choreplay? Where Hoovering = Sexy Time
It's the guys' turn: Facebook's Sheryl Sandberg is telling them to lean in – to the hoovering, in exchange for a better sex life. We, er, investigate.
First things first: we love Sheryl Sandberg. Sure, we had some issues with Lean In – namely, how easy it is to do the same, though only if you’re a wealthy white person – but, by and large, the idea of encouraging women and girls to make themselves heard in the workplace and lean into the boardroom table is not a bad one.
Similarly, the #banbossy campaign was pretty deadly. It wasn’t about preventing women being “bossy,” per se, but about a rebrand that meant that girls who are outspoken and opinionated didn’t automatically get shut down with the B-word. See? <3 Sheryl.
But her latest idea – espoused in her New York Times column, How Men Can Succeed in the Boardroom and the Bedroom – shines a spotlight on the idea that, and let’s direct quote here, “couples who share chores equally have more sex.” Sheryl even suggested that, if a man wants to do something nice for a woman, rather than buying her flowers (Sheryl possibly has a regular €200-a-week flower delivery as is), he should do the laundry.
We have to be frank here, Sher (can we call you that?): if one of our fellas came home and said, “hey, I was gonna buy you flowers as a treat but I thought I’d come home and do the washing up instead,” we wouldn’t be too long knocking some sense into him. The washing up is our combined chore. The laundry is our combined chore. Cleaning the house? Yep, you guessed it – that’s our together chore too, and any idiot who thinks he’s doing us a ‘favour’ by doing his half has another thing coming.
Maybe there is some truth in it; we can easily imagine a scenario where a man and a woman share chores and have a deadly relationship, and sex life, to boot. But that’d be cos both he and she recognise that they are equal partners in a relationship where offering to do shared chores is never a ‘favour’, or a bargaining tool that can in any way be referred to as “choreplay.”
So guys – sure, step up and share those chores. We’ll definitely like you more for it, and that may well translate into having the ride. But if you think you’re doing us a favour, think again.
Pic credits: Thinkstock
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