Think you might be ready to make the big move? Here are some helpful questions to ask yourself first.
It’s exciting when you and your partner start planning your life together, which of course, might involve moving in together.
But as we all know, visiting someone and living with them is a totally different ball game and although you may love seeing each other as much as possible, sharing the same space can be a make or break ordeal.
Think you’re ready for the big move? Here are some things to consider before moving in with your partner.
1. How well do you really know them
This may sound silly but knowing your partner’s odd habits and particular traits is vital before moving in with them. You may love spending time with them at any given opportunity, but are you aware of their day to day routine? Some couples find it very difficult to adjust to living with their significant other due to multiple lifestyle differences. One of you might be a night owl while the other is a light sleeper. Do they put the toilet seat down after themselves? Can they respect your space? These are all very important things to keep in mind.
Can you afford living together and how do you plan on dividing the rent, bills? Some couples may have a wage difference and that can also cause some tension in a relationship. Before when you were either living alone or with family you had a clear note of how much you needed to spend and when, but when you move in with your partner those costs can double. Sometimes sharing the cost of expenses is harder for one party than it is for the other and finance is often the cause of many fights. Having a money discussion before moving in with your partner is not just important when discussing a price point for a house, but it’ll also make you more comfortable to continue having money chats down the line when you’re both open about the topic.
3. Do you disagree often?
This is again a very basic question, but it holds a lot of importance. The last thing you want to do is move in with someone who you are constantly butting heads with. You may get along perfectly fine when you’re not in each other’s space all the time, but both being able to defuse petty arguments is key so you don’t have to deal with disagreements about apartment décor or what you want to eat. It’s important to work through your issues with your partner before you move in together to eliminate the tension and the first month’s stress of living together all the time.
Choosing to live together while being in a relationship means you need to trust that person as not only a partner, but as a flatmate too. Trust them to divide certain responsibilities, trust them to pay their part for rent and bills, trust them to cook the dinner or clean the home if you’re busy or at work. Trust is very important and moving in together without trust will make things very difficult for the two of you both in and around the house and romantically.
5. Never move without a plan
Having a plan is crucial. Moving in together on a whim may seem spontaneous and great, but it can leave the two of you struggling either financially or mentally which can damage or completely destroy a relationship. Think things out to the final detail. Make a budget, explain what you both want, and think about the location and your aspirations for the future.
Planning things out can help you notice the signs that you ae not yet ready to live together, from financial issues to simple things like wanting your own space or needing more freedom.
Moving in with the person you love is a very important and big step; don’t let yourself be pressured into a decision you may or may not regret.
Always think twice and put yourself first, and if moving in together is really want you both want and it looks promising, go for it.