5 Seriously Gross Things You Touch Every Day

You can be the cleanest, tidiest person in the world – but there's still poo in your house and in his beard – and flesh-eating bacteria in your vagina. (So there.)

dirty nails hygiene

Think you’re super clean? Of course, you obey the 20-second handwashing rule; you use a nail brush to get in under your fingernails; you’ve got a bottle of hand sanitiser at your desk (and in your bag, and by your bed…); and you always sneeze into the inside of your elbow.

How would you feel if we told you none of that mattered? No matter how clean you are or what careful steps you take, your body is harbouring all sorts of nasties (including poo in men’s beards), some of which have made their way inside your orifices. Gross, right? Right.

Your nails are hotbeds of grime

Nappy-changing, poor bathroom hygiene and dodgy kitchen habits can all mean that what lies beneath your nails is waaaay less than sanitary. Well research has shown that diarrhoea-causing bacteria is hiding under the nails of 24% of men and 15% of women (so we’re more hygienic than lads which, sorry, doesn’t come as a huge surprise). Get scrubbing with that nail brush – but don’t forget, the brush itself needs to be replaced every two to four weeks to keep it effective, otherwise you’re just cleaning up with, er, more dirt.

Fingers + non-applicator tampons…

So if your fingers are big culprits when it comes to icky bacteria, dirt and, eh, baby poo – imagine how that multiplies when it comes to inserting tampons (or mooncups, for that matter). Your vaginas are delicate little organisms, and any fluctuation in bacteria levels can lead to things like thrush or vaginitis. Symptoms include abnormal, smelly vaginal discharge, burning when you pee, itching around the vagina and vulva and discomfort during sex. So, y’know, not really worth the risk.

One snog = 80 million bacteria

Yep, you read that right – opening your smackers and swapping spit for just 10 seconds can have you sharing a serious amount of bacteria with your partner of choice. Which is kind of grand if that’s your boyfriend or girlfriend getting the shares on, but what about that random stranger you snogged in Whelan’s last Friday? Or the guy who lobbed the gob on you in the queue at Charlie’s the weekend before that? It really doesn’t bear thinking about.

Your vagina is host to a skin-eating bacteria

Your down-there area naturally produces a bacteria that eats dead skin cells. Not only that, but it produces a mild form of bleach – which explains why you may notice cotton underwear fading slightly over time. It’s not dangerous; in fact, it’s produced to protect your body from disease and infection, but it is a little… weird.

Dog doo-doo’s in your house

If you own a dog, chances are, you’ve got a garden – but unless you run around after your pooch with a poop-a-scoop, there’s no way you haven’t ended up with some of that excrement inside your home, probably on your couch, your bedcovers and in your kitchen. Once your pet poops outside, wind and rain are all that are needed to break that stuff up and blow it around the garden until it’s indistinguishable from regular dirt. You walk outside to hang out the clothes, and then walk back in… bingo! Poo everywhere.

This may make you determined to wash more carefully, scrub those nails and avoid walking outside – but us? It’s just made us more laid back. Sure, it’ll get in anyway. There’s no point fighting it. It’s done us no harm, has it? (Yet…)