Ask James: ‘My Dog Does NOT Like The Guy I’m Dating. Are We Doomed?’

James Kavanagh answers your questions like only a gas bitch can.

I’ve been dating a guy for the past while and he’s met some of my friends and all has gone well. But I introduced him to my dog and my dog didn’t take to him at all. She actually trotted into the other room, whimpering. What do I do? Aoife, Dundrum

Em. I hate to tell you this, but you might be dating Satan – or at least one of Satan’s friends. What kind of human doesn’t get on with dogs? Dogs usually jump all over anything with a pulse regardless of race, religion, gender or sexuality. Dogs are actually v progressive when you think about it. Maybe next time when you’re sleeping with your guy, wake up before he does and check for ‘666’ under his hair.

Any advice on what to cook for a brunch for my boyfriend’s parents who are coming over for the first time? I want to impress. Sorcha, Dublin

Don’t try to impress with overly-fancy food; keep it simple and delicious. People always remember gorgeously tasting food rather than elaborate, ‘showy’ food. If they aren’t vegan or veggie, make creamy scrambled eggs (or poached) bacon, avocado, roast tomatoes etc. and lay them all out in ramekins/ bowls across the table for a big feast-y vibe where people can help themselves.

For extra points (and this really isn’t an effort), juice some oranges (one or two blood oranges too) and plonk a big jug of freshly squeezed orange juice out when they arrive. Freshly brewed tea is a must and I’d recommend Barry’s loose leaf. And for extra points, make a little loaf of soda bread and raspberry jam. They’ll be gushing about you for months.

Weird one, but I saw you’re in a book club and I’ve been wanting to get into reading for ages now. I’m such a bad reader though and can’t seem to commit. Any advice on how to get stuck in? Jan, Cork

When I was younger I used to DEVOUR big books, but then phones came and I found Instagram. However, over the past year I’ve been slowly reintroducing myself to books (real ones, not Kindle) and I’m LOVING it. What I did at the start (and this sounds so gross and dystopian) is I’d read a few pages and then reward myself with a few scrolls on Instagram. I’d then move myself up to 1 chapter = 10mins on Instagram and so on. Eventually I didn’t need the social media reward and I loved reading again! So treat yourself every time you read a bit and you’ll learn to love it.

Got a problem? Insta James @jamesalankavanagh or email with the subject like ‘Ask James’


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